夢と現実の間
Between dreams and reality
負ける気がしねぇ！！
Tracy desu yo, pessimist and world’s worst procrastinator. Uni student with still a lot of things to learn. Interests include otome games, Naruto and Japanese.
 : Loves pink, food, ice-cream.
Summer is my eternal love.
Waiting for:
chitchat:
recent update :
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post placement thoughts (real 400th post)
written on Monday, July 21, 2014 @ 11:27 PM ✈
LOL last time I posted a "400th post" but it seems blogger lied to me because I had some drafts which add to blog post count, so this is the REAL 400th post (ㆀ˘･_･˘)
This post is long overdue so I apologise (ू˃̣̣̣̣̣̣︿˂̣̣̣̣̣̣
ू) But unfortunately before I talk about that, I have something else unrelated to say. Which is that holding onto something that doesn't even exist anymore is so pathetic of me. The holidays are still dark. And then there are people who you make an effort to contact and hang with but they never reply no matter what it is - skype, fb, text even though everyone knows in this day and age it's impossible to not see one of those immediately, if not at least within the same WEEK. Sure, I miss plenty of calls but I always make an effort to reply as soon as I can (definitely within the same day). That, and along with just so many other things going on right now makes me say, was I really of that little worth? Screw it, just screw it all.
Haha and then there's you. You who forced me to walk this ridiculous tightrope, telling me what to do, what I can't do. But in the end it didn't matter if I followed your strict rules, the outcome is always the same. Blamed me for not "believing" in you, but you couldn't believe in me. Told me lie after lie, then lied about it being a lie in the first place. I don't even know what I'm meant to do anymore, thanks for that.
And now for some better stuff (sorry). Yes, I admit that I was super bummed and completely tired as hell every single one of those 10 days of placement but looking back on it now, I can honestly say I thoroughly enjoyed it. What it involved: a lot of bad smells, a hell of a lot of cleaning which = the driest fingertips on earth, feeding time (yay!! who doesn't love food), walking, soooo much laundry and a million miscellaneous tasks.
I think doing placement really drove to home for me that what we're getting ourself into is of a physical nature, not office work like those following the arts/law/actuarial/commerce path. It's mentally and physically tired. But you know, the place doesn't have that many staff members, but instead, relies so much on the work of volunteers. And what I saw just really spoke to me. Pretty much everyday that I was there, there were always a lot of new faces. For those two weeks it really felt I forgot about the darkness because all I could see were so many people who were willing to give up their time (which they could have used for a hobby, to do work, etc) for the animals there (even if it meant doing jobs like cleaning). And that honestly really touched me, and the commonly used phrase - "restored my faith in humanity."
Honestly when you're there you can really feel the love and care that everyone there has, that we all hope the animals will find their forever homes but until they do, they try their best to make their time at the shelter as comfortable as it can be. Which brings me to my next point. The RSPCA gets so many animals and since there are limited resources, they are forced to put down animals after a set amount of time has passed if they don't find a home. However at the shelter, there is no such thing and they keep them until however long it takes (one dog was there for a year). They also keep lost pets for 7 days (if it has no microchip) or 14 days (microchipped) in hopes their owner will come get them and if not they are up for adoption whereas at RSPCA after that time frame they'd be put down (or so they told me).
Lol one random point but everyday for the first 3 days (because there was a different person in charge each day) I was told by the staff that my bed making skills for the dogs were excellent (by bed making I mean the way I put out the blankets in their kennels). Towards the end of the second week, I met a new volunteer on her first day there who went to Ruse and was a year ahead of us and she now studies dentistry in Melbourne. Her enthusiasm really got to me. Unfortunately, when you do repetitive things you sometimes take them for granted. I was out doing the beds again and when I finished and thanked her for her help she excitedly told me how she was really looking forward to the dogs having a comfortable sleep, snuggling on those blankets that night. And it surprised me, because she was exactly right and I hadn't really thought about that, and in that moment I really felt that she had a really kind heart.
The rest of that day was quite interesting, we had a great conversation and it made me feel at ease that there was someone else who shared the same thoughts. We talked about how twisted the world is, that there's just so much crap thanks to humans, how depressing it is to watch the news, that if we weren't the ones running the planet, would it be better? Animals don't feel silly things - lies, jealousy those things don't really exist. Their life is quite simple. She told me about her cat (which she loves very much) and how he's always there to listen when she's troubled. I can totally agree on that. Pets are so perceptive when it comes to how you feel, and even though they can't give you a solution for your problems, they're always there to hear you out. And honestly? That's exactly what I need 99% of the time, I don't need anyone judging me or telling me what to do, just someone or something to be there for me and empathise with me.
I'm really going to miss my time there, it really helped to remind me why it is that I chose animals over people. I only hope that in the future I can continue to give back even a little of what Peter and Lucy taught me. I'm going to miss the fact that I never once got to catch or suss out just who took any of the dogs home since I always had a buttload of tasks to do that it literally was the case that one second I turn around, and the dog is adopted and gone and I didn't get to say goodbye or see his/her new family. So many were adopted during my short time there, it really makes me happy.
It's always bittersweet because you won't be able to see them anymore but you hope they've found their new home. Left on the first Friday, and came back on the second Monday to find that my favourite dog and favourite cat had been adopted. Said goodbye to all the animals on the last Friday, and on Saturday found out (online) that the goodbye wasn't even because I wasn't there anymore, but that my favourite cat #2 wasn't there anymore (adopted) and so the goodbye was for real because I'd never see her again even if I did go back! And on my last Friday there they brought in the most beautiful rabbit ever and I never got to play with him for more than a day :'( I still check their site sometimes because it tells you who's been adopted and it's quite heartwarming to see them go.
Going to miss the punny bunny names - Arnold Schwarzbunegger, Obi bun-kenobi, Erin Bunkovich, David Hasselhop, Hot Cross Bunny, Rabbit de Niro (and I also found out they previously had a Kirsten Bunst).
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post placement thoughts (real 400th post)
written on Monday, July 21, 2014 @ 11:27 PM ✈
LOL last time I posted a "400th post" but it seems blogger lied to me because I had some drafts which add to blog post count, so this is the REAL 400th post (ㆀ˘･_･˘)
This post is long overdue so I apologise (ू˃̣̣̣̣̣̣︿˂̣̣̣̣̣̣
ू) But unfortunately before I talk about that, I have something else unrelated to say. Which is that holding onto something that doesn't even exist anymore is so pathetic of me. The holidays are still dark. And then there are people who you make an effort to contact and hang with but they never reply no matter what it is - skype, fb, text even though everyone knows in this day and age it's impossible to not see one of those immediately, if not at least within the same WEEK. Sure, I miss plenty of calls but I always make an effort to reply as soon as I can (definitely within the same day). That, and along with just so many other things going on right now makes me say, was I really of that little worth? Screw it, just screw it all.
Haha and then there's you. You who forced me to walk this ridiculous tightrope, telling me what to do, what I can't do. But in the end it didn't matter if I followed your strict rules, the outcome is always the same. Blamed me for not "believing" in you, but you couldn't believe in me. Told me lie after lie, then lied about it being a lie in the first place. I don't even know what I'm meant to do anymore, thanks for that.
And now for some better stuff (sorry). Yes, I admit that I was super bummed and completely tired as hell every single one of those 10 days of placement but looking back on it now, I can honestly say I thoroughly enjoyed it. What it involved: a lot of bad smells, a hell of a lot of cleaning which = the driest fingertips on earth, feeding time (yay!! who doesn't love food), walking, soooo much laundry and a million miscellaneous tasks.
I think doing placement really drove to home for me that what we're getting ourself into is of a physical nature, not office work like those following the arts/law/actuarial/commerce path. It's mentally and physically tired. But you know, the place doesn't have that many staff members, but instead, relies so much on the work of volunteers. And what I saw just really spoke to me. Pretty much everyday that I was there, there were always a lot of new faces. For those two weeks it really felt I forgot about the darkness because all I could see were so many people who were willing to give up their time (which they could have used for a hobby, to do work, etc) for the animals there (even if it meant doing jobs like cleaning). And that honestly really touched me, and the commonly used phrase - "restored my faith in humanity."
Honestly when you're there you can really feel the love and care that everyone there has, that we all hope the animals will find their forever homes but until they do, they try their best to make their time at the shelter as comfortable as it can be. Which brings me to my next point. The RSPCA gets so many animals and since there are limited resources, they are forced to put down animals after a set amount of time has passed if they don't find a home. However at the shelter, there is no such thing and they keep them until however long it takes (one dog was there for a year). They also keep lost pets for 7 days (if it has no microchip) or 14 days (microchipped) in hopes their owner will come get them and if not they are up for adoption whereas at RSPCA after that time frame they'd be put down (or so they told me).
Lol one random point but everyday for the first 3 days (because there was a different person in charge each day) I was told by the staff that my bed making skills for the dogs were excellent (by bed making I mean the way I put out the blankets in their kennels). Towards the end of the second week, I met a new volunteer on her first day there who went to Ruse and was a year ahead of us and she now studies dentistry in Melbourne. Her enthusiasm really got to me. Unfortunately, when you do repetitive things you sometimes take them for granted. I was out doing the beds again and when I finished and thanked her for her help she excitedly told me how she was really looking forward to the dogs having a comfortable sleep, snuggling on those blankets that night. And it surprised me, because she was exactly right and I hadn't really thought about that, and in that moment I really felt that she had a really kind heart.
The rest of that day was quite interesting, we had a great conversation and it made me feel at ease that there was someone else who shared the same thoughts. We talked about how twisted the world is, that there's just so much crap thanks to humans, how depressing it is to watch the news, that if we weren't the ones running the planet, would it be better? Animals don't feel silly things - lies, jealousy those things don't really exist. Their life is quite simple. She told me about her cat (which she loves very much) and how he's always there to listen when she's troubled. I can totally agree on that. Pets are so perceptive when it comes to how you feel, and even though they can't give you a solution for your problems, they're always there to hear you out. And honestly? That's exactly what I need 99% of the time, I don't need anyone judging me or telling me what to do, just someone or something to be there for me and empathise with me.
I'm really going to miss my time there, it really helped to remind me why it is that I chose animals over people. I only hope that in the future I can continue to give back even a little of what Peter and Lucy taught me. I'm going to miss the fact that I never once got to catch or suss out just who took any of the dogs home since I always had a buttload of tasks to do that it literally was the case that one second I turn around, and the dog is adopted and gone and I didn't get to say goodbye or see his/her new family. So many were adopted during my short time there, it really makes me happy.
It's always bittersweet because you won't be able to see them anymore but you hope they've found their new home. Left on the first Friday, and came back on the second Monday to find that my favourite dog and favourite cat had been adopted. Said goodbye to all the animals on the last Friday, and on Saturday found out (online) that the goodbye wasn't even because I wasn't there anymore, but that my favourite cat #2 wasn't there anymore (adopted) and so the goodbye was for real because I'd never see her again even if I did go back! And on my last Friday there they brought in the most beautiful rabbit ever and I never got to play with him for more than a day :'( I still check their site sometimes because it tells you who's been adopted and it's quite heartwarming to see them go.
Going to miss the punny bunny names - Arnold Schwarzbunegger, Obi bun-kenobi, Erin Bunkovich, David Hasselhop, Hot Cross Bunny, Rabbit de Niro (and I also found out they previously had a Kirsten Bunst).
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Japan and Korea 2015 Masterlist
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Summer TO-DO List
((to be updated as I think of more things while I procrastinate))
✮ Foster kittens
✮ Clean out closet
✮ Make LOTS of ice-cream
✮ Bake + Cook (and use the molds and kits I bought from Japan)
✮ Study Japanese (JLPT N2 level)
✮ Learn basic Korean sentence structures
✮ Play Dousei Kareshi (~50 hours right there, what with my slow Japanese reading speed)
✮ Finishing playing Naruto Shippuden Ultimate Ninja Storm Revolution
✮ Buy Naruto -The Last- Movie DVD and then rewatch it
✮ Start applying for things……..
✮ Invite people over to drink the endless amounts of tea I have
✮ Make things with the alcohol and liquor stash I have (lol)
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my sunshine
links exchanged opened! just tag me but link me first
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